My daughter was married the other day--my only child, I'm very happy for them both for her husband
is a fine boy--cheerful, honest, faithful. And my daughter--well--she is my daughter and I look at her with pride.
But she wants to leave me!
All our lives since the first day she opened her brown eyes at me, my husband and I have built around her our hopes and our plans. We have given her what we could and always, when we could not give, we explained and she understood. She has helped us, too, and has been a great comfort. Now she strains away from us to a sparsely furnished, rented bungalow and our house already seems to echo with loneliness.
It is not as if they needed to go. Our home is convenient to her husband's work. Our house is spacious and furnished comfortably. Upon them her taste and mine were lovingly expended--a piano, a library, big beds; windows that look through old trees.
I cannot decide whether she really wants to go or whether it is a point of honor with them. We would like them to live with us, as our children. But realizing they would like to be alone, we have offered half the house to them. We want them to stay. It will all be theirs some day and why should they skimp and save to pay for furniture and rent when they could have it all here and welcome?
You mothers of married girls understand this feeling. Some of you, too, have persuaded your daughters to stay at home--and have not regretted it. Or have you?
In Response--"Another Mother" from Ohio
The letter of "The Mother, Iowa" appealed to me, for my husband and I had the experience of living with his mother for nearly two years. From our experience has sprung the hope that our children may enter homes of their own, however humble, as soon as they are married.
I had the care of the home. If I wanted to paint, varnish, or buy a new piece of furniture, "Mother" would feel that her things weren't good enough for me. If mother bought part of the groceries she was doing more than her share; if we bought all of them, we didn't want her to do anything.
No, however much you and dad may miss daughter let her have her own home, choose its furnishings, do her own planning. She and her new husband will be much happier if they work out their own salvation.
Another thing, the young man will be happier and get more satisfaction out of a home he has provided for his bride than he will to live with her people and feel that they are supplying the necessities as well as the luxuries of life that are really his right to provide.